Had the harsh realization. Found that old colleagues and friends that make significantly less than you just talk shit about you behind your back. Talk down on your career, the neighborhood you live in, the car you drive etc. Many people say they want you to succeed up until you’re more successful than them. Then they want to see you fail. It’s a harsh reality. You can’t even share goals or achievements with them because it makes them feel bad about themselves. Once you hit a certain level where your TC is double or triple that of your friends, they start to view you as an outsider and not one of them. You just can’t relate the same anymore. You have completely different issues. It’s unfortunate. Anyone else deal with this? TC: 190k
Demons do exist !
1/3 of 190 is not livable wage in California…
My Uber driver friend makes fun of my 9-5, my big TV, my 401k contributions etc. One time I was wearing a nice button down shirt and dress shoes then he said “why are you dressed like you’re going for an interview?”. Fucking idiot. That’s why he’s not my friend anymore. I figured he was just jealous that I had a great job, was probably better looking and that he was working a dead end job as a cab driver. Fuck him!!
LMAO. It's all sour grapes.
Happens. Time to cut those people off
They aren't your friends. Never will be.
Indian?
lol no
It's very common when we see people with significantly more than us to think that they must have acquired it illegitimately or are undeserving of it. It's partly our ego protecting itself and partly our darker instincts rationalizing reasons to take it from them. Jealousy and resentment are terrible things, best to distance yourself from them.
My colleagues yes, my friends no. My friends are supportive, cheer me on, and we celebrate each other’s successes, big or small. That’s what good friendships are about. I have friends who make much less than I do (and others who make more), we hang out, do affordable activities together, and we focus on what we have in common. They are wonderful people. Colleagues, otoh 👀. Many colleagues do not want to see you succeed. Even if you work at completely different companies. I have to be very careful about how I ask for referrals because if you want a similarly leveled (or worse, higher) role at their company you will get ghosted or redirected to a lower level role. I can and do get appropriate level roles through other channels, but the crab bucket mentality is very real in tech. Not everyone is like this, but I’ve been shocked at how pervasive it is.
Have experienced this myself. Got an offer outside of Google for 70% higher TC and told my Google friends about it, which lead to a bunch of drama. Best to be tight lipped about your finances.
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Bro your friends make 1/2 or 1/3 of 190k?? Get rid of these brokies
Some of them can’t break passed 50k
Thats insane. I hope this is not in US. Otherwise, I stand by what I said. Get rid of these friends before they drag you down with them. Alternatively, if you really want ti stay friends with them, then try to find ways to help them increase their comp or try to relate to them by pretending to be sad and mention something like "there are 21-22 year olds making 200-300k and it makes me feel sad too"