Closed now - thank you all
This was a post asking for advice on how to handle a bullying /indecent behavior in my kid’s daycare. It’s resolved now (spoke to her teacher ). Will continue monitoring her safety. Thank you everyone for your inputs. I appreciate it but removing original post to protect privacy of everyone involved.
talk to her teacher separately and let her know that if anyone needs to move class , that would be the boy . It would be prudent for the teacher to bring that up with the boy’s parents assuming he is from a stable logical household. Let the teacher know that your kid’s name or your name cannot be involved in any disciplinary action and she cannot talk to your child about it . Be assertive and strong to imply consequences without saying it out loud . Your daughter should feel that her parents magically made her troubles disappear and still kept her with her favorite teacher . This would improve her confidence in bringing up these issues much sooner and even enable her to fight back - like push the guy away without worrying about the No No rule . Good luck and lot of positive vibes your way and for your little princess
Thank you so much! This is a very good advise. I just wanted to be sure if that’s how we should handle it.
Not sure about this being a good advice. Sounds like an entitled parent trying to show dominance over the teacher. Why not just talk to the teacher person to person? Tell the teacher about potential issue with the boy’s behavior and ask them to keep an eye on the boy’s behavior. It’s not about the boy and your daughter. It’s about the boy potentially being a threat to the rest of the kids.
You should have talked to her teacher the instant you, the adult and parent, felt uncomfortable by how your child was treated. You can rationalize all you want but accept that while doing so, you’ve allowed things to escalate to a point where your child is now directly asking you to address it. Talk to her teacher and recount everything in detail, FULL DETAIL. From there you should insist that admin is notified with you present to confirm the notification happens and is accurately depicted. Why put your child in a situation where she’ll have to recount this?? And if she feels uncomfortable, or god forbid guilty, what if she softens or changes her summary. Allowing your child to be in this situation or putting the onus on her to recount it now (before escalation would have been more appropriate) leads to more conflict, potential trauma, and confusion that a child is nowhere near developed enough to comprehend or process. You should be ashamed of yourself. Handle your business like an adult and check your audacity before parading your parental negligence on blind. Cowardice.
She told me this last night and I am going to talk to her teacher this morning. Regarding previous instances when she said he touched her, I immediately asked her wher and one day she said “elbow” and one day she said shoulder. What was there to complain about then? I reiterated that she should tell no if someone is in her space
So disturbing! This boy should be kicked out completely from the daycare, IMO. If extreme action isn't taken and he's not given therapy, he'll pose a threat later on.
Hopefully he outgrows it. Not sure if he saw some Movie scene or someone is doing it to him. I thought it might be just play but the fact that he is timing it and making sure the teachers can’t see him by taking girls to the corners (near bathrooms ) is very concerning
This is so uncalled for 😡 Go and speak to the teacher and summon the kids parents as well. Educate the chap what he is doing is not right. Also let our little girl be also brought to an understanding that she cannot let anyone touch her any where no matter what unless it's you.
Your comment where you addressed as “our little girl” teared me up. Thank you for being so kind… it take a whole village to raise a kid and our little girls need all the support from the society so that they grown into confident women without any trauma. Our little boys should also grow up into wonderful young men with no baggage or anger issues coz of either misunderstandings or simply not knowing right from wrong. Thank you again - I posted here to know how other parents handle a similar situation and I got to learn a lot (as my daughter says “you are learning coz you are a mamma for the first time in your life… you may make mistakes but that’s coz I am your practice baby 🥰”)
Our little ones indeed need to be taught what is right and whatbis not...very early on in their lives 🙌
This is definitely not acceptable. On the other hand I also fear who must have introduced all this to this boy. It’s sad to even think someone else might have been doing the same thing to him. You definitely need to report this to teacher so that she can also understand and make his parents aware of it, probably saving him from ruining himself even further or look into the sources.
Are for real, you have time to write and post this instead being at your kids school talking to the teachers , either you are one sick pedaphile who made this story up or you have no common sense
In high school I used to volunteer at a kindergarten daycare (5 year olds). This sounds normal and common. Humans develop signs of sexuality early. There is a lot of hand-holding, hugging, humping, girlfriend/boyfriend etc going on in American daycares. That's just part of being in a liberal culture. Actually as kids get older, they become more conservative with these things. But yes if your child feels harassed or bullied then the teacher should intervene, that's different.
Is the boy white?
Yes
I am assuming your daughter is Asian or Indian. This is common among white boys from what I’ve seen, their parents will take it as offense from the teacher, I suggest pressuring the teacher to have you speak to the parents. The boy clearly has no manners and your daughter shouldn’t be subject to such things at a young age.
Did you to talk to school director?
No - just the class teacher. I didn’t want the teacher to feel like I am complaining about her. I am not accusing the teacher of not keeping an eye on the kids (I know how hectic it gets with 14 kids even with a teacher and teachers assistant ). I am hoping the teacher will report to the admin or the director. Should I talk to the director separately ?
Also this daycare is new and for some reason are not reporting anything. Thrice my kid got hurt but they never sent a note in the report or told me (previous daycares used to tell me immediately if anything happened )
One cannot assume what a 5 year old can be exposed to in these digital era.... Have a talk with the teacher directly. Rather than raising it as a complaint ( as you don't know if this is intentionally done) communicate this behaviour and ask her to keep a watch on this boy and don't let this happen in future.