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Here are three stats about how your money is increasingly useless after the most recent inflation report
- wife talks to mil every day n tells everything, all expenses, what we ate, even our sex lives - mil always tell my wife is right - mil whenever visits uses above information to taunt us especially me - mil has her expectations of how we should be living our lives which we don't do n she is bitter about it but makes me feel I am inadequate - mil n fil visit us in US for 2-3 months in summer. They would be coming soon. - mil expects us to book her tickets, buy her cloths etc. ( she doesn't expect anything more so that's ok).. she hardly or never got us anything, even did minimal 5-10 lakhs expenditure in wedding. Rest 60-70 lakhs I n my wife paid. ( In laws are rich ppl though) - mil doesn't even like my wife much n actually want to give all property to son.. n keeps praising them whenever she comes. I don't like to spend much time with her so just pretend office work, but then for 3 months I am alone pretending while my wife spends time with mil n complains she misses me. My wife lives in delusion that mil is best mom n that she got her educated, which is bloody every other parent did. Mil also says what all husband should do n raises my wives expectations n my wife now feels she is just adjusting with me. - in a way life is not too bad as mil would never want us to divorce as that would mean divorced daughter but she also doesn't let us live a peaceful loving life. ( E.g. I took leaves when my wife was depressed just to support her, later got taunted, any husband would do that n good husband do bla bla too. Got my wife $3000 earrings n coat for this birthday, got taunted that bigger gift n party/travel was expected, all this while my fil or her brother never bought her a thing. I said her this n she started crying for coming from poor family.) - my wife n I have amazing chemistry n comfort otherwise. My parents had been interfering in the start but I don't allow them much so it's not an issue. TC mine: 400, wife: 370
Classic Indian arranged marriage issues. You have one leverage here OP: “mil would never want us to divorce as that would mean divorced daughter”. Grow some balls and tell her that you would divorce your wife if she keeps on taunting you like this. So ask her to stop taunting or you will send divorce papers
Please don’t do this - you’re only going to hurt your wife. Don’t take divorce lightly, it will only fill your wife with uncertainty and push her more towards your in-laws.
@Amazon, I am not asking OP to divorce his wife. I am asking OP to tell his MIL that if she keeps on with her taunting, he will divorce her. In my opinion, his MIL is one of those barking types, who don’t actually bite.
If you're seeking therapy, blind won't help. Talk to a therapist
Actually I do find Blind therapeutic. When i post something and immediately ppl start hating me, I know I’ve got something good that they don’t- and I appreciate it more
Have you tried being worse when they are here. Just to match their expectation that you’re not good?
Only three months of summer in Seattle. And MIL takes away two of those 🤢
OP got a chudail mil. That's all I can say.
Chudai* mil. And see if she tells her daughter about the sex life
Nothing good comes from so much openness between a couple and their parents. Your wife needs to understand this otherwise life is only going to get difficult. Talk to your wife openly and set expectations of how much to share and where to draw the line. Your wife needs to have her own life and expectations rather than living it for her parents. If talking directly isn’t productive try couples’ therapy. Source: similar situation for 2 of my siblings over the past several years, and things have just gotten worse with too much parent involvement.
Problem: you are weak. You are beta. You should not have allowed this level of interference from the beginning. Solution: have some spine to speak up even though they don’t like it
In so many words - listen to this man. Browns spine and ask her to change her ways. She won’t, then give her an ultimatum and then if she STILL doesn’t change her ways.. Kick.Her.Ass.To.The.Curb. Let her be another man’s problem.
Too long and didn't read the entire post but your wife is a weirdo for talking to her mom about your sex life and you're mil is a creep for wanting to listen to it. They clearly have no boundaries
Toxic
Indian?
You’ve to ask? Pretty obvious.
Could just as easily be pakistani