I hear more and more people referring to "partner" at work. Does it offend people if I talk about my wife? I understand I shouldn't ask other people about boyfriend/girlfriend, etc. I'm just curious if I'm "allowed" to say "wife" or if I need to say "partner" for inclusivity/DEI reasons. Appreciate serious remarks from DEI-minded folks.
Refer as partner/SO/spouse
But why?
Wife is a boomer slur
If you’re asking this, better just go with partner and shortly after update your pronouns
Sarcasm semi-appreciated.
Partner = your girlfriend/boyfriend at a pretty advanced stage but not married
Sometimes. Many people use it to refer to spouse. Which is confusing, of course. Which is why I'm wondering why "partner" is so commonly used.
They are doing it wrong. A woman who is a wife to a Man is to be referred as wife or Spouse and nothing else. A woman who is a wife to another Woman is to be referred as a Partner or a wife. A man who is a partner to another man is a partner. Married couples are spouses or wives not partners. Partners are either one half of a gay couple or a boyfriend or girlfriend when you are a bit older. It’s juvenile to refer to your bf or gf as that when one is older than 35 ish years
Nobody cares. Refer to her as wife if you want.
If nobody cared then the people I work with who have a wife wouldn't be saying "partner". I'm thrown off why they don't just say wife instead of leaving the gender ambiguous. I can only guess that it's a weak attempt to empathize (?) with any non-heteronormative folks in the room.
Married folks on my team refer to their wives as wives. Others say girlfriend or partner.
I refer to my wife as wife. If other people want to refer to their partners as partners I'm ok with that, whatever is their gender combination. I expect equal courtesy given to me and so far it has never been a problem.
Wife is perfectly fine. Please don’t second guess yourself.
Refer to your wife however you’d like to. There’s nothing offensive about you calling your wife, “my wife.” When talking to others, just don’t refer to their partners as “your husband” or “your wife.” The idea of DEI is accepting and encouraging others to be themselves, not hiding yourself
This makes sense. But I see other people I work with "hiding themselves" by using partner. I guess I don't understand why if your partner uses a gender, why not call them whatever they are (e.g. husband/wife, fiance/fiancee, boyfriend/girlfriend, etc.)?
No one is hiding themselves. Some people just like the word partner. As a millennial I’ve “grown up” with it and like it. I don’t care if anyone says husband or wife about their spouse. Not everyone has to be like you. Live and let live, dude.
so people are getting offended if someone is married a woman?
Not that I know of. I'm just curious why my default behavior of calling my wife my wife doesn't match the behavior of my co-workers who call their wife their partner.
Maybe those coworkers are not married.
If the folks you are talking to are close enough that you would talk about your partner with them, then why not just say their name and take all this suspicion out. Once you say I and Rebecca watched a movie together after the baby slept, everyone will easily guess who she is. I have actually never heard any coworkers say partner. I found that through blind.
Wlb must be very good at your company huh
It wasn't great. Don't work there anymore.
Not sure why you talk about her at work but if you do, then refer to her as the ol’ ball & chain.